What was your Good deed for the day?

IMA SOL MAN

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
May 18, 2023
Messages
2,125
Location
The HEART of the USA.
Regardless of not seeking reward or fame, it is not a selfless act because deep down inside it makes you feel good about yourself. Ultimately, that is your heart's reward.
Two things:

1. In Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts they teach Do a good turn/deed daily.
I think that when we follow that, we are doing two things, 1. giving service to others, and 2. making ourselves feel good, because there is something psychologically rewarding in helping others.

2. The Golden Rule from the Holy Bible: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Also, the Commandement to Love your neighbor as yourself. Kind of the same thing. Not a choice, though, a rule and a Commandment from The Creator. We may not want to do that good deed, but we are commanded to, so... *shrug* is it self-rewarding at that point? I don't know. That's beyond me. BUT! I do believe that it is rewarding to HUMANITY...and as they say, "What goes around, comes around." You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours. There is a universal wisdom in everyone treating each other well. We are all in this together.
 

Monocrom

Flashaholic
Joined
Aug 27, 2006
Messages
20,175
Location
NYC
That's just it. If a person does something solely for recognition I question their motives. For example, we sometimes give awards to volunteers. A person who is truly in the spirit of doing good would be insulted by that. I love when we have concerts to get people to donate to a cause. I question the motives of both the people donating, and those giving the concert. You want to do something, just do it. If the person you're helping thanks you that should be enough, but don't even expect that.
That's how it should be.
But human nature being what it is.... Nope!
 
Joined
Mar 12, 2010
Messages
10,390
Location
Pacific N.W.
@IMA SOL MAN, I agree with both
1699465832798.png
.

However, I don't get the point you're trying to make or how it's related to the post of mine you quoted. 😁
 

IMA SOL MAN

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
May 18, 2023
Messages
2,125
Location
The HEART of the USA.
@IMA SOL MAN, I agree with both
View attachment 52023.

However, I don't get the point you're trying to make or how it's related to the post of mine you quoted. 😁
Point 1 agrees with your post about good deeds making us feel good.
Point 2 gave another reason for doing good deeds other than to make ourselves feel good. In fact, it can be a downright inconvenient pain in the donkey to do a good deed. For example, your neighbor is all the time asking to borrow your tools, or feed their pet while they are gone on vacation, or pick up their mail and (in the old days) their newspapers. Etc, etc. you get it. Now, I'm not saying that the Love thy neighbor as thyself commandment compels you to comply with all those requests, but, maybe it would be an act of love to have a "little talk" with that neighbor about how it really would be better for them to become a little more independent/self-sufficient rather than taking advantage of the kindness of others. Isn't that what you would want, if you were that dependent neighbor? Sometimes you have to exercise "tough love".
 

jtr1962

Flashaholic
Joined
Nov 22, 2003
Messages
7,505
Location
Flushing, NY
2. The Golden Rule from the Holy Bible: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Also, the Commandement to Love your neighbor as yourself. Kind of the same thing. Not a choice, though, a rule and a Commandment from The Creator. We may not want to do that good deed, but we are commanded to, so... *shrug* is it self-rewarding at that point? I don't know. That's beyond me. BUT! I do believe that it is rewarding to HUMANITY...and as they say, "What goes around, comes around." You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours. There is a universal wisdom in everyone treating each other well. We are all in this together.
If a person is religious, and does things for others solely with the goal of helping them get into heaven/nirvana/elysium/etc. then it's ultimately self-serving. An atheist has no such dynamic pushing them to do good for others. Their reason is right there in the bold-faced portion of your post. There's this thing called civilization. It's ultimately to everyone's benefit to treat each other well, or civilization falls apart, then we all lose.
Now, I'm not saying that the Love thy neighbor as thyself commandment compels you to comply with all those requests, but, maybe it would be an act of love to have a "little talk" with that neighbor about how it really would be better for them to become a little more independent/self-sufficient rather than taking advantage of the kindness of others. Isn't that what you would want, if you were that dependent neighbor? Sometimes you have to exercise "tough love".
Some people just aren't capable of being less dependent, either due to physical limitations or mental ones. That's why having safety net programs is a good idea. I wouldn't want to be the neighbor obligated to do stuff for the highly dependent person next door. I'd rather pay a little more in taxes so we can pay a person to help them professionally. This doesn't mean I won't do anything for my dependent neighbor. It just means I won't have to offer help on a regular basis.

I agree trying to get people less dependent who don't have any physical or mental limitations. I had a former friend (same guy who used to criticize all my life choices) email questions about different subjects. Eventually I told him you could do a Google search the same as I do and find the answers yourself. He was just being very lazy. He did finally take the hint.
 

jtr1962

Flashaholic
Joined
Nov 22, 2003
Messages
7,505
Location
Flushing, NY
By the way, while we're talking about doing good deeds, how many here regularly refuse help from others? I do for the simple reason accepting help often comes with strings attached. The person helping will often constantly bring it up. Or they'll expect help from you in return if they need it. The latter might not be a huge problem except for the fact it seems people have needed help from me at the times I was least able to give it. Maybe I'd have a really busy week working, then on top of that stuff in the house needed fixing. I'd be spent, just couldn't give them help, then they would be bringing up how selfish I am not helping them, etc. This is why I learned to just start refusing help from the time I was a kid. Thanks but no thanks. I'll figure it out on my own. I don't like feeling indebted to people.
 

IMA SOL MAN

Flashlight Enthusiast
Joined
May 18, 2023
Messages
2,125
Location
The HEART of the USA.
Regardless of not seeking reward or fame, it is not a selfless act because deep down inside it makes you feel good about yourself. Ultimately, that is your heart's reward.
I disagree with this, a bit.

A selfless act does have the capacity to make one feel good about oneself, but I don't think that it is a certainty that it will. If you watch Schindler's List, at the end, Schindler was remorseful that he could have saved more lives, but he chose not to. He saved many lives, yet he did not feel good inside about it. This is just an example that I thought of off the top of my head, but I'm sure that there are others.

Sometimes I have done something that was insignificant to me, for someone, but it was greatly appreciated by them. We just have no clue what a random act of kindness can mean to another person. You never know, someone could be on the verge of suicide until you give them a compliment, or some other small thing, that would seem insignificant, like opening and holding a door for someone. I'm not saying that that would do the trick, but just an example of how small things that we do because we were brought up with manners, can mean a lot to another human.

When you lose a loved one, and someone you know shows up at the viewing, or the funeral, it means a lot to you. Sometimes even just getting a sympathy card or note from someone can make a world of difference to a grieving person. People are so self-centric, and wrapped-up in their own little world, that small acts of thinking of others has a profound effect sometimes. I felt this when my parents died. I also experienced the gratitude of a former schoolmate when I attended her brother's viewing/family visitation. I didn't attend out of any motive of feeling good about myself, I went out of compassion and fondness for their family.
 

Monocrom

Flashaholic
Joined
Aug 27, 2006
Messages
20,175
Location
NYC
As far as Schindler goes, the film and the reality were quite different. With one critic pointing out that the film was "very kind" in its portrayal of Oscar Schindler. Which was his extremely polite way of saying that the man was far from the self-less, warm, and caring person depicted on film. Also doesn't help that Schindler's List was a propaganda piece that angered all of the Jewish consultants on set (all saved by the real Schindler) to the point they walked off, and never returned.

They understood, it's a film; not a documentary. Still, even with that, Spielberg took FAR too many liberties. Schindler wasn't a great man. Far from it. But he did a great thing. The deeds should have been what was emphasized more. They weren't, and in fact the aspects that Spielberg personally hated, he just pretended they never took place.
 

jtr1962

Flashaholic
Joined
Nov 22, 2003
Messages
7,505
Location
Flushing, NY
As far as Schindler goes, the film and the reality were quite different. With one critic pointing out that the film was "very kind" in its portrayal of Oscar Schindler. Which was his extremely polite way of saying that the man was far from the self-less, warm, and caring person depicted on film. Also doesn't help that Schindler's List was a propaganda piece that angered all of the Jewish consultants on set (all saved by the real Schindler) to the point they walked off, and never returned.

They understood, it's a film; not a documentary. Still, even with that, Spielberg took FAR too many liberties. Schindler wasn't a great man. Far from it. But he did a great thing. The deeds should have been what was emphasized more. They weren't, and in fact the aspects that Spielberg personally hated, he just pretended they never took place.
Isn't that Hollywood in general? Most filmmakers are very bad at showing the shades of gray in a character. You could do great deeds and still be a horrible human being. The pure villians or self-less good guys shown in the movies just don't exist in the real world.

I've found many foreign films do a far better job of portraying people as they truly are, warts and all.
 
Joined
Oct 21, 2011
Messages
371
Location
Seattle
A good deed is not done for our benefit, why then seek the approval of others?
I don't believe in altruism, period. When I do something nice for someone, like slaying a dragon that wanted to wipe out humanity, it benefits me more than it does them. I think it can be healthy to share acts traditionally viewed as altruistic as an example to others on brotherly love and empathy. Now I know that I am in fact the strongest creature in the universe because I had to jump so high that I made through an empty void in a vacuum to have to climb a mountain that was eleventy-seven trillion meters high to slay the most ferocious human-hating beast in the universe. Yet, I demand nothing. Because I love you all, even if some of you are buttheads sometimes. Or maybe I'm the butthead. Or maybe we're all a bunch of buttheads bouncing around in a fart factory doing our best not to die of the stench of the filth we create for ourselves.
 
Joined
Oct 21, 2011
Messages
371
Location
Seattle
So, maybe not in the spirit of the thread but I'll share something nice someone did for me today. I get allergy shots. I have very bad allergies, to a lot of stuff. Mammals, dust mites, molds, pollens, etc. I am told that I am unusually sensitive to the shots and my allergist has had a real battle slowly escalating my doses over the past year. Today, for a number of reasons, I went into anaphylaxis and my allergist saved my life. I'm totally fine now, the epinephrine is still making me a bit on edge. She was awesome, handled it like a champion. To my credit, at no point was I scared or irrational, but make no mistake, the very least would have been a very not fun trip to the hospital if she wasn't such a pro. I do not welcome death but neither fear it, and once again tested it. Anaphylaxis can seem like not a big deal these days because epinephrine is so powerfully effective, but make no mistake, if you enter into it and do not have epinephrine, are by yourself or do not have powerful steroids you can absolutely die and it happens quickly. While it could be argued she did her job and did it well, in my eyes she saved my life today and will forever have my gratitude. Needless to say, next week I'll be my usual 20 minutes early to my treatment with a very nice bottle of champagne to thank her for being very good at her job.
 
Joined
Mar 12, 2010
Messages
10,390
Location
Pacific N.W.
I don't believe in altruism, period. When I do something nice for someone, like slaying a dragon that wanted to wipe out humanity, it benefits me more than it does them. I think it can be healthy to share acts traditionally viewed as altruistic as an example to others on brotherly love and empathy. Now I know that I am in fact the strongest creature in the universe because I had to jump so high that I made through an empty void in a vacuum to have to climb a mountain that was eleventy-seven trillion meters high to slay the most ferocious human-hating beast in the universe. Yet, I demand nothing. Because I love you all, even if some of you are buttheads sometimes. Or maybe I'm the butthead. Or maybe we're all a bunch of buttheads bouncing around in a fart factory doing our best not to die of the stench of the filth we create for ourselves.

DUDE! You really need to relocate away from Seattle!
 
Top